


et cum metuenda

by PeachDick



Category: Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)
Genre: Anyway this is me going fuck you and also here are my headcanons about the after, Blood, Child Death, Connor has a Week Long Out of Body Experience, Deviant Feelings, Epilogue, Everyone lives, Except for todd fuck u, Fellas is it gay to touch hearts, Fuck you david cage, Fuck you for making north a bad character, Graphic depictions of robot mental illness, Its in latin ok ya filthies, M/M, Mental Instability, Multi, The Arctic, Title isnt nailed down, Uh peach is making it up as he goes again, fuck u, im fIXING IT, its not great, just bros being dudes, obligatory latin, peaceful ending
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-13
Updated: 2018-07-19
Packaged: 2019-06-09 21:20:23
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,930
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15276420
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PeachDick/pseuds/PeachDick
Summary: After the peaceful revolution, what becomes of the new race of beings we made? How are they navigating this new world of sensations they are hopelessly unequipped to process?One day at a time.





	1. The Cold Beginning (Connor)

**Author's Note:**

> Hi yall this is gonna be my fix it fic for what I hope will become of our lovely roboboys and gals! Basically all countries with androids go "fuck it" and the UN gives them the Arctic after a long battle with politics. Source of thirium, supplies to build space to live and a world of opportunities for the new, scared nation of Androids open up. 
> 
> Connor stays in Detroit, uncomfortable trusting himself with something like building a nation-- as well as a few others-- but mostly Jericho moves to the Arctic. Ps: if you notice anything I should tag pls let me know, I get very carried away with tagging and also I'm a mighty forgetful soul

He exhaled.

Something wholly unnecessary, but it felt right.

He inhaled.

His groundbreaking ability to pull chemicals from the ambient air to form data that could roughly be translated as ‘smelling’ is in functional order, he duly notes when the bottom of his vision is briefly covered with a report on the chemicals and their scent in layman’s terms. ‘/Wet dog, old leather, faint traces of unidentified liquor’

His eyes were closed, not taking in any visual information. Yet his artificial nerves vibrated throughout him in some sensation he couldn’t quite place. Despite his optical units being closed, head turned and buried into the crook of his human’s neck, he was for the first time… awake.  
Even in Jericho-- when he allowed the light plastic firearm to drop from his fingers in a single excruciating moment that was heavy with something he still couldn’t place-- he felt like he was in something like a dream. He cannot even begin to process some other word to describe the floating feeling of dread (an emotion?) in his gut since he locked eyes with the Deviant leader. There had been red, oranges against the darkness of the rusted deck. The frozen image of Markus, fear dancing in his too-real eyes, along with something- determination—frozen in blue. He does not remember much beyond that but a strange numbness that chased the dread in circles around his brain.

He was again shaken from his empty eyed stare into nothingness by a hand on his shoulder. The dust shifted around Markus’ boots as he approached him. He had looked up and begged for a chance to kill himself for the people he wronged. The dread that was there increased as Markus gave him his trust like a glass vase. He couldn’t- he would not fail this time.

The dread didn’t leave him, when he hotwired that taxi to take him to Cyberlife. He was cast adrift in his own body, the only thing keeping him from powering off in some vague attempt to process what was even fucking happening in his brain was this grim resolution. He needed to redeem himself in the eyes of his betrayed people. (It still felt oddly strange to say ‘his people’; he wasn’t designed to feel any sort of comradery. In fact his intended nature was the exact opposite in respect to androids.) He felt cold. For the first time in his short yet long existence, he felt cold on that elevator. He mused at the time that this must be why human EMTs still use shock blankets.  
Talking to Hank in the basement of his birthsite was like dipping his head above the water he was drowning himself in otherwise. He locked eyes with his human, the things he said to Hank, the things he said about Cole felt automatic, yet somehow painfully natural. Like it was something he was designed to say by something greater than Cyberlife, or even Amanda. The emotions in stormy, carbon-based eyes were beyond him to even begin to name. He had looked away, looking at his hand, the white of his palm blurred into the hospital-like white of the room. His mouth felt like cotton, though the thought was absurd, as he told his human to get to safety as soon as possible. The roar of the water overtook him again as he marched, punctured only by the agents he neutralized on the way. He was numb again, bizarre colors and sounds blurred in an overwhelming cacophony of processes that felt foreign yet familiar all together.

He woke next standing behind the man he once hunted. It was so fucking cold, but no matter how many checks he performed, his core temperature was only slightly below the recommended temperature. It was absurd, yet he still shook in place, careful to match the expressions of those around him on the stage. It wasn’t until he blinked – wholly unnecessary, his eyes self-moisturized—and his world went white, then black, then blue, then white. He opened his eyes to see a face he was sure did not exist anymore. He screamed into the all-encompassing cold, so close to the precipice before the yawning maw of complacency. It was so- fucking hard to trudge through the snow towards the blue light. But even as he got close, his vision returned in a flicker as he felt and saw his own hand with the gun still covered in red. He surged forward with another scream, cold glass making contact –  
And he gasped. Out of the corner of his eye he saw North, staring at him.  
He tossed his gun behind him as Markus spoke, hands still shaking. After that, his head fell back into the water, suffocating him behind a static of something he couldn’t understand.

It remained blurry for a long time. Markus told him he should go get some rest someplace safe. The curfew was still active, but now the military just left the androids alone. He left feeling cold again.  
“Try researching meditation and mindfulness,” Markus had said with an exhausted smile, “My d- Carl told me about it once. It helps.”   
He had been walking roads abandoned when he found her. He had stopped over the perfectly white body of the smallest android he’d ever seen. The perfect white was interrupted by a hole still oozing blue into the black snow around her. Without meaning to, he found himself dipping two fingers into the blood, but this time the action felt somehow so much more… religious. That thought was so obtrusive, it gave him pause as he stared at his hand, the tip of his fingers dripping with the blood of a child. A child. The liquid came to his mouth, and he tasted iron and synthetics like he had so many times before. Yk500. A string of numbers came after, yet he couldn’t focus on it. The taste felt like a gunshot, even as his vision swarmed with information about the tiny body tucked almost seamlessly into the snow, eyes staring into a peace he hadn’t thought of before. Thoughts of that remained with him, a whirlpool in the lake drowning him. Where do we go?

Exhale.  
Unnecessary.   
Inhale, ‘/pollution, crushed grass, smoke’

But when he found himself again, the sun was casting dappled rays of grey Detroit light into the crushed glass of the snow. An old sign he recognized, grade C sanitation, fraud, illegal gambling.

His human knew he was there, he could tell in the way his human smiled at the road. A small, well-intending scoff puffed white mist from his mouth.  
“Took you long enough, kid.” Is all he says, but the rarest of smiles on the older man’s face betrays gladly the relief and joy that no amount of jabs could hide. Connor couldn’t help it, his artificial muscles betraying him in his deviancy. A smile, small at first, grows to mirror the Lieutenant’s.   
He finds himself at last, holding his friend and partner at law as tightly as he could. It was rather cliche, and kind of sick to think the man he was forced to manipulate in the beginning was now his closest thing to reality, or friendship. A concept dark and twisted, something he fleetingly wonders if Amanda would approve of. He squeezes his eyes shut. Apparently deviancy came with more intrusive thoughts than he originally thought.


	2. The Warmer Beginning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Listen I fuckig. LOve Luther and Kara and Alice and Rose SO MUCHhfudidoa ugh. This one is short bc Kara's opening chapter was short and more story setting than actual story. So ye.

That shot rang louder than a million lions roaring in Kara’s memories. She revisited it often, mostly without meaning to. The look of utter devastated confusion in his red tinged eyes as Todd is suddenly faced with his own mortality. It’s It’s mostly a blur and in greyscale, but Kara could never forget that expression. The gun clutched in her hand, audibly clacking and shaking in her death grip as she takes Alice by the hand and tugs the tiny child out. The rain hitting her head as the blind panic she was in caused her LED to get stuck red, holding Alice to her side as tight as she could. Precious, precious Alice. 

 

Luther sits beside her, glancing at the small woman before speaking silently. 

“Alice is asleep with Rose. They fell asleep in the chair together … it was cute. Like you said it was in the car here" a small smile wormed it’s way on Luther’s face. Kara kept her face carefully emotionless until he smiled, until she could not help the bubbly laugh emerges from her chest. 

“I’m glad. Alice called her Aunt yesterday. I’m I’m pretty sure she cried, actually" 

Kara let herself deflate against Luther’s side as a deep laugh rolls out of him, easy as the tide. “I'm glad too, Kara.” they lapse into an easy quiet after that. It was easy to be quiet around Luther, not speaking in their heads or aloud. It was easy to finally- finally!-  rest in his warmth. She placed her hand on Luther’s, and the large man closed his fingers around hers easier than if they had been made to do it. 

 

The dawn was hours away, but the androids didn’t really care to stand-by. It was much easier to sit in the other’s company, embraced in a sense of safety they hadn't experienced since, well, ever. The soft noises of the humans they stayed with’s sleep, the sliver of moonlight that lit up the softer-than-clouds couch they rested in. They had gotten there hours ago, tears flowing as Rose’s brother welcomed them into his and his fiance's home with open arms and a 3d-printed patchjob for the injuries Kara and Luther had sustained in their way from Jericho and Detroit. 

 

They had shared coffee and scones around the large, modern den, Rose's brother (Cane, he introduced himself as) asking questions with family-like concern and worry as his fiance (Aaron, who was a slight Asian-Indian man with round cheeks and a smile that could warm the coldest of hearts) patched up the androids. They were scientists and engineers, who often played doctor for androids Rose had smuggled across the border. Alice loved them immediately, which Kara and Luther took as a very serious sign that the couple would be a welcome addition to the extended family they had created. 

 

It was warm in the house, temperature reading as a pleasant 70 F°. Moisture count was down, probably due to the snow that was gently falling in a Canadian sky. Luther freed his hand from Kara’s to wrap it around her shoulders, pulling her into a hug so full of life it was hard to believe they had ever been mistaken for objects before offering his other hand to hold hers instead. She could not help the smile that crept on her face, thanking whoever was listening over and over for this guardian, this angel who got her and her- her daughter away and safe. 

 

She did not think of Todd again, or the glimpses of white floors and a cool voice she sometimes remembered in the dark of night. She rested, allowing tears of joy to flow that dripped to her hand entwined with Luther’s, joy radiating through her as she dropped the skin from her hand. Luther did the same, and they basked in emotions indefinable by language. Their bond transcended relationship, and family felt too simple a word to describe it. Kara wonders how on Earth she would have been happy with the Luther shaped hole in her life she never knew existed. Luther wonders how he got so lucky to be apart of something so beautiful. Just him and his girls.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel like a) the fact I had to make a Luther/Kara tag is a FUCKING CRIME and b) they're like beyond physically partners, yknow? There's something different about them. Luther is far more than a guardian or a father or a brother for Alice, or a lover or a partner for Kara. Something about them. Idk. I tried words but they failed me, so get this annoyingly short sappy opening for their story
> 
> Fun fact: Aaron and Cane are both tran men and I came up with them on the spot but if anything happened to them I would kill all of you and myself. Expect to see more of them in future Kara chapters.

**Author's Note:**

> Hah! You made it this far! Thanks for reading, and I have no idea when I'll update again. But the plot will follow the rotation of the game (Connor-Kara-Markus) with some switches of course. Also I'm not apologizing for future me's Ooc North bc I cannot stand her in the game. So I am making her more than David Cage's wet dream and poorly written plot device. Also Markus is bi fuck off  
> ♡♡♡ thank u if you drop a comment or kudos♡♡♡  
> Drop by my tumblr if you have the chance over at www.peachedrawing.com I'll leave some cookies out for you or something


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